s0fti3w1tch:

Shake them

Shake them

SHAKE THEM

chidorigoushi:

block-swing-perry:

finsihed :)))))) goodnith

mysticlibraryhushbats:

A typical Raph and Mikey pillow fight:

Mikey’s a tough one to pin down!

Source: Daniel Labelle on TikTok

littleleafdragon:

I read that softshell turtles burrow themselves in sand or mud when they sense a threat, so now I have a headcannon that whenever Donnie is feeling particularly stressed or upset he buries himself in as many blankets as he can find and stays there until he feels better.

bunniesbitch-deactivated2020071:

mondogecko:

shredder:

Don:

incorrecttmntquotes:

“One time Mikey was angry at me because I ate the last piece of pizza and when I asked for some water he brought me a glass of ice and said ‘Wait.’”

— Leo, probably

here is what the tmnt would be like drunk

hotmilkytea:

leo: very Concerned; the Mom Drunk; makes sure everyone is drinking water, makes sure everyone is Having A Good Time; is found in the shower at 3am staring at his feet, crying silently because “what if pigeons DO have feelings?”.

raph: may or may not be crying while loudly telling anyone sitting close to him, “NO. SHUT THE FUCK– SHUT THE FUCK UP. I LOVE YOU, MAN. AN’ I KNOW I DON’T SHAY IT ENOUGH. CUZ SHOMETIMES YOU’RE A REAL ASSHOLE. BUT I LOVE YOU SO FREAKIN’ MUCHSH. YOU’RE MY BRO. MY *BRO*. AN’– *passes out, snores, has the worst hangover for two days afterwards*”

donnie: doesn’t remember a single thing but has woken up inside a missile silo, a walmart, and the pentagon, usually after making ten robots; gets Really Excited; definitely conquered a planet; definitely stole a lot of stuff; had to be stopped from test-driving a new jetpack off the side of the empire state. if he gets hangovers, he doesn’t show it because he’s used to waking up in the morning on two hours sleep feeling like trash. if anything, blacking out and waking up ten hours later leaves him refreshed and vibrant ready for the day ahead.

mikey: just shotgunned a bottle of vodka. just threw it up. immediately shotgunned a family-size bag of doritos. definitely does the cinnamon challenge. definitely beats the cinnamon challenge. definitely defends old memes as “the classics”.

casey: got arrested.

april: got arrested bailing casey out.

splinter: GATHER AROUND, MY SONS, I MUST TEACH YOU A VERY IMPORTANT LESSON. YOU ARE YOUNG MEN, AND SO THE FINAL NINJA DISCIPLINE MUST BE TAUGHT TO YOU. WHEN I FIRST MET MY WIFE, TANG SHEN–

karai: alcohol makes her even better. nobody can understand why. everybody is afraid of her. does shots and then calls people out to fight. always wins.

77 Things Michelangelo is Not Allowed to Do on a Mission

winnyverse:

winnyverse:

1.) Don’t stop anywhere for snacks when asked to scope out a perimeter.

2.) Not allowed to create a distraction unless one has been specifically requested.

3.) No cosplay.

4.) No mid-battle dance breaks.

5.) Grappling hooks are not toys.

6.) Not allowed to refer to Leonardo as Leerless Feeder.

7.) Not allowed to fake dyslexia.

8.) Leave the pigeons alone.

9.) A ninja cannot set his weapons to stun or kill.

10.) Do not post anything we are doing to instagram.

11.) Also may not tweet, reblog, or status update about the current mission.

12.) Leonardo’s orders may never be disregarded for religious reasons, especially if that religion is Rastafarianism.

13.) May not operate motor vehicles for any reason whatsoever.

14.) Cannot respond to Leonardo’s handsigns with vulgar ASL.

15.) Not to accuse team members of demonic possession or try to perform impromptu exorcisms.

16.) Not allowed to look through Don’s bag of tricks for something corrosive.

17.) Not allowed to look through Don’s bag of tricks for something explosive.

18.) When asked why explosives or corrosives might be necessary for the mission, “no reason” is never an acceptable answer.

19.) Not allowed to look through Don’s bag of tricks for any reason.

20.) Amnesia is never a good excuse for my behavior.

21.) Neither is “the mind worms made me do it”.

22.) There is no such discipline as “voodoojutsu” and never will be.

23.) It is not okay to borrow Raph’s sai because I forgot to bring shuko spikes.

24.) Not allowed to yell “olly olly oxen free” when Leonardo gives the handsign to break stealth.

25.) Leonardo’s reminder of the gameplan is not to be followed by the words “It is known” or “so say we all”.

26.) May not drink three or more sodas before any mission we know will require surveillance.

27.) Half-melted jolly ranchers are not a good substitute for caltrops.

28.) Mission takes priority over T-phone games, even when really, really close to beating a high score.

29.) Awnings are not trampolines.

30.) No taking selfies with the enemy.

31.) I am not Batman.

32.) I am not the Terror Who Flaps in the Night, either.

33.) No pretending to be drunk.

34.) No actually being drunk.

35.) Hitting on the enemy is unacceptable, even with reason to believe that they might be super hot under that mask.

36.) No giving away our position because an ambush is taking too long.

37.) It is not necessary to “power up” any moves by yelling or calling out their names at top volume.

38.) New additions to the underwear collection are never a mission priority.

39) At no point during a mission am I allowed to stop to work on a drinking game list based on common occurrences during missions such as ‘take a shot every time Leonardo makes the ‘be quiet’ eyes’ or ‘take a shot every time a Foot ninja gets another bone broken’

40) I am not allowed to play the Ninja Turtle Super Secret Mission Drinking Game during a mission

41) I am not allowed to record the missions and play the Ninja Turtle Super Secret Mission Drinking Game back home at the lair later

42) Do not blast ‘The Final Countdown’, ‘Eye of the Tiger’ or ‘Don’t Stop Believing’ from my t-phone when the fight begins

43) Fights do not require any musical soundtracks. At all.

44) During no mission is it acceptable to make loud, heavy breathing noises and then tell enemy that “I am your father”

45) Do not invite enemy to “pull my finger”, not even when it is really, really funny

46) Not allowed to fight with sock puppets on my hands

47) Definitely not allowed to make sockpuppets narrate fight in funny voices

48) I am not Bugs Bunny and therefore cannot convincingly dress up as a sexy woman and distract the enemy

49) The addition of bunny ears and tail does not help

50) Not allowed to fake an injury so that Raphael is forced to carry me

51) Not allowed to deliberately get an injury so that Raphael is forced to carry me

52) Not allowed to distract enemies by performing the Single Ladies dance, even if I do know the whole thing and am really, really good at it

53) No one wants to hear me sing ‘We Are The Champions’ over and over again on the way back to the lair

54) I may not do a “victory lap” of the block with the enemies’ underpants tied to Don’s bo staff and brandished as a flag

55) Substituting yoyos, strings of salami or foam bats for actual ninja weapons is not funny, it’s dangerous, our enemies are serious and will kill us given the chance

56) Inviting the enemy to a dance-off isn’t cute

57) Neither is inviting them to a rap battle

58) Or a poetry slam

58) Going forward, I am not permitted to speak to the enemy at all

59) Attempting to communicate with the enemy through mime is also forbidden

60) I may not carry flashcards to write messages to the enemy on

61) Enemies are unlikely to know morse code and I am just wasting leisure time trying to learn and if I really want to study then Leonardo would be more than happy to help me with my Japanese

62) Do not search for enemies on Tinder OR Grindr in the middle of a fight in order to invite them to a dance-off/rap battle/poetry slam

63) Suggesting we attempt to infiltrate enemy headquarters by disguising ourselves as the next hottest boy band in search of a wealthy patron is infantile

64) During an escape, grabbing the wheel of an enemy vehicle and saying “don’t worry, I saw this on a cartoon once” is strictly forbidden

65) Yes, so is actually attempting what I saw on the cartoon

66) No marijuana may be “confiscated” by me so that it does not “fall into the wrong hands”

67) In the instance a confrontation with the police occurs, I am to vanish and not say “hey nice cosplay, are you on your way to NYCC too?”

68) Am absolutely under no circumstances to follow this up with “wow, that gun looks super real, can I hold it?”

69) I am not a psychic conduit for sensei to pass on messages to Leonardo through, especially when those “messages” are contradictions of Leonardo’s direct orders

70) I am forbidden from eating chili dogs, cauliflower, eggs, pepperoni pizza, garlic, any Mexican food, any Indian food, cabbage or onions before a mission

71) Wedgies are NOT an acceptable attack.

72) Neither are super atomic Wedgies

73) Neither are wet willies.

74) When ambushing an enemy, running off to “grab a couple of pies” is irresponsible and not allowed.

75) The Turtle Titan and the Turflytle costumes stay in the lair.

76)  I am not allowed to quote horribly lip-synced Japanese action films to the enemy… or to my teammates

77)  It is not OK to change Raph’s ringtone to “Everybody Was Kung-Fu Fighting” then call him in the middle of a battle.

———————–

This list was inspired by Skippy’s List. If you can think of any more, include them in a reblog and I will add them. I’d love to see this list get as long as possible. The original Skippy’s List had 213 items.

Sorry I took so long to add the new additions. You guys made fantastic contributions!

Also, I made a minor edit to #35 on the list, since it was so controversial and disgruntled some people. My intention was only to make people laugh with this post. Now you guys can imagine Mikey lusting after whomever you please!